Recently I checked in my advice box and found this request: “How do I get over the girl I’m so deeply in love with after she left me for another man?” 

Dear “Deeply in Love,” 

Healing isn’t a straight path. Getting over someone you’re deeply in love with- especially when they left you for someone else- can feel like trying to breathe with the wind knocked out of you. It hurts your pride, your heart and sometimes even your sense of who you are. But as painful as it is, heartbreak can also be a turning point that helps you grow into a stronger and more self- aware person.

• One step you can take in moving on is accepting that the relationship has ended, even if you don’t fully understand why. When someone chooses to be with another person, it’s easy to fall into the trap of comparing yourself to them, or wondering what you “did wrong.” Sometimes people grow apart, want different things, or simply aren’t the right match. Accepting that you can’t control her choice is painful, but it also frees you from constantly replaying the situation in your mind.
• It also helps to create some distance. Seeing her posts all the time, rereading old messages, or asking friends about her new relationship can keep the wound open. Taking a break from her on social media and removing constant reminders gives your mind space to slowly adjust to lie without her. This isn’t about pretending she never mattered– it’s about giving yourself a fair chance to heal. Talking to friends, or putting your feelings into new hobbies or self-care can help relieve that emotional pressure in a healthy way.  
• Be sure you focus on healing yourself before you try to jump into another relationship (this includes rebounds). You could practice the 3-3-3 rule, 3 days of emotional release, 3 weeks of reflection and no contact, and 3 months to focus on yourself before dating again. Make sure you can love yourself before you try and love someone else. Every relationship teaches you something– about what you need, what you value, and how you want to be treated. 

In the end, getting over her doesn’t mean forgetting her, or pretending you never cared. It means reaching a place where the memories don’t hurt as sharply and where your happiness doesn’t depend on someone who chose a different path. Healing takes time, patience, and self-kindness– but little by little, the weight in your chest will get lighter, and you will still realize you’re moving forward. And eventually, you can try to put yourself out there again. 

No pressure, no names, just an honest buzz—If you need advice click here. 

Until next time, 

Bee-atrice